digitalwanderer
Legend
You have no taste, John defines "man pretty". 8)Reverend said:
I'm now scared of gays
- Thread starter Reverend
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rachaelsdad
Newcomer
Your experience is so much like mine Reverend. Fresh back from Nam and in Nursing school. All the men in that core are listed and we were fresh meat for the gays; since a higher than normal percentage of us were assumed to be not straight.
Got a call from a guy who had seen me on campus and wanted to meet me had have a "gay" time and this with a little of the old school sexual trash talk. It completely unnerved and frightened me. My fear was that perhaps I was of that bent and he knew it since he was gay and as we all know "It takes one to know one". Plus I couldn't help but think You are what you fear!
Got another call the next night from another man,for the same thing, but without the sexual innuendo crap and decided to meet him. We talked about the call the night before and why he wanted to meet me. He was just wanting to be able to talk to someone male who was not gay. He was tired of always having to be "on" with his partners and wanted to just relax and "be".
Thiry years later he is still a friend and was more than happy to play the church organ at our wedding.
I do not know if this is why you felt uncomfortable; this is just what my feelings were after that first call.
Got a call from a guy who had seen me on campus and wanted to meet me had have a "gay" time and this with a little of the old school sexual trash talk. It completely unnerved and frightened me. My fear was that perhaps I was of that bent and he knew it since he was gay and as we all know "It takes one to know one". Plus I couldn't help but think You are what you fear!
Got another call the next night from another man,for the same thing, but without the sexual innuendo crap and decided to meet him. We talked about the call the night before and why he wanted to meet me. He was just wanting to be able to talk to someone male who was not gay. He was tired of always having to be "on" with his partners and wanted to just relax and "be".
Thiry years later he is still a friend and was more than happy to play the church organ at our wedding.
I do not know if this is why you felt uncomfortable; this is just what my feelings were after that first call.
Natoma said:Himself said:Does attractiveness of the person coming on to you affect how flattered you are?
Of course.
So how flattered you are depends on how good looking you find the person, right? I think it's all a matter of degree, based on your own vanity. If some ugly person comes on to you, you either feel mildly flattered or not at all, or even disgusted at the thought. So, telling people they should automatically feel flattered by come ons from the same sex is rather hypocritical, don't you think?
For one thing, most straight guys don't have any clue or understanding of gay guys, they don't get the attraction at all, don't know what criteria they are using for selecting you, if they have any at all, it's just wierd, uncomfortable, awkward, and they wonder if they should feel insulted. If there is any fear, it's fear of being put in awkward situations like that, having to deal with extra bullshit in addition to everyday bullshit, lol. Flattered wouldn't come into it unless you knew what the frig the guy was complimenting you on.. lol If a guy likes to frig sheep and comes on to you, does that mean you look like a sheep? lol (It's just as incomprehensible is what I mean, not equating the two.)
I've been hit on by gays several times, didn't know them from adam, they don't introduce themselves or ask if you are gay, so you know they are your typical male pig, they just happen to be gay, and the freaking crudeness of it was amazing, I'll spare you the details. Lots of straight pigs out there to, don't like them either, so long as they don't get in my face, to each their own. Flattered doesn't come into it, if it were a hetero situation and I was a woman, I'd want to slap the bejesus out of the fucker, same thing. Fear doesn't come into it for me, beyond having to deal with the awkwardness, but ignorant people infuriate me in general, don't want to have anything to do with them. It's interesting to get the female perspective on being hit on by jerks, but would rather avoid it.
There was a sentence after that ya know.
In short and in a non-sarcastic manner, it's saying that I'm not fundamentally anti-straight or heterophobic.
I really do take it as a compliment that others find me attractive. But I don't say "Oh good lord now I've got to feel wary about women." I mean really now. I think it's rather silly that someone would feel wary or scared because another man came on to them.
It's not that big of a deal.
In short and in a non-sarcastic manner, it's saying that I'm not fundamentally anti-straight or heterophobic.
I really do take it as a compliment that others find me attractive. But I don't say "Oh good lord now I've got to feel wary about women." I mean really now. I think it's rather silly that someone would feel wary or scared because another man came on to them.
It's not that big of a deal.
Responding to someone coming onto them with fear and wariness is frankly the childish behavior imo.
But hey, sarcasm and obvious derision are merely ways to attempt to defuse a rather silly concept, i.e. "omg i ph33r the mansechs because someone came on to me! run away aaaaiiiiieeeeeee!!!"
Really now.
But hey, there was a post after that sentence and icon you quoted as well which was completely serious. It's not that big of a deal. That just sounds to me like you've got your own personal issues to work through. You, Rev, and anyone else that would be offended or scared out of your wits that, heaven sakes, someone found you attractive.
I responded in such a manner precisely because I don't believe this is a big deal. So what someone came on to you and they happened to be the same sex. Did they do anything untoward? Did they try to rape you? Did they try to force themselves on you? I mean good lord the only thing I'm hearing is that they came on to you, you said no thanks, and that was it. Same with Rev's situation.
Wow, the horror.
p.s.: If someone I'm not attracted to came on to me, I am very friendly about it and say "no thanks" or some other thing. I don't get the fear of god in me about a woman coming on to me. Nor do I get the fear of god in me about an unattractive (imo of course) man coming on to me. It's frankly nice for me to be found attractive by anyone.
Not that I really care since I've been a happily married man for 4 years. Well, 4 years on November 28th, but that is neither here nor there.
The point is, you have issues if you get scared, wary, disgusted, et al, by someone coming on to you simply because they're of the same sex. But hey, that's just my opinion. Feel free to agree or disagree if you so choose.
But hey, sarcasm and obvious derision are merely ways to attempt to defuse a rather silly concept, i.e. "omg i ph33r the mansechs because someone came on to me! run away aaaaiiiiieeeeeee!!!"
Really now.
But hey, there was a post after that sentence and icon you quoted as well which was completely serious. It's not that big of a deal. That just sounds to me like you've got your own personal issues to work through. You, Rev, and anyone else that would be offended or scared out of your wits that, heaven sakes, someone found you attractive.
I responded in such a manner precisely because I don't believe this is a big deal. So what someone came on to you and they happened to be the same sex. Did they do anything untoward? Did they try to rape you? Did they try to force themselves on you? I mean good lord the only thing I'm hearing is that they came on to you, you said no thanks, and that was it. Same with Rev's situation.
Wow, the horror.
p.s.: If someone I'm not attracted to came on to me, I am very friendly about it and say "no thanks" or some other thing. I don't get the fear of god in me about a woman coming on to me. Nor do I get the fear of god in me about an unattractive (imo of course) man coming on to me. It's frankly nice for me to be found attractive by anyone.
Not that I really care since I've been a happily married man for 4 years. Well, 4 years on November 28th, but that is neither here nor there.
The point is, you have issues if you get scared, wary, disgusted, et al, by someone coming on to you simply because they're of the same sex. But hey, that's just my opinion. Feel free to agree or disagree if you so choose.
Well, if you want to put everybody into one big pot, that's your business, all straight guys are like this or whatever, just don't complain if the reverse occurs..
I have no fear of gays, I'm not threatened in any way, I don't secretly fear that I am gay, but I don't have any desire to be a part of that culture, I don't want to join a high society club either, different groups got their own ways and they are to your taste or not. I find the automatic defensive replies to someone honestly expressing how they feel to be a waste of time, who gets in the last comeback foolishness, who cares?
I don't find the concept of gay sex between males disgusting, nothing to do with me, but don't like it taking up slots in my porn channels, lol. Looks rather boring and limited to me, but I don't have any reaction to it. Don't like looking at naked guys in general, they are either disgusting or they make me feel like maybe I should work out more, lol. To each their own, but they might as well be sheep for all they do for me, thank god for lesbian porn, lol. I have stood two feet away from guys going mad at each other and I feel the same way about being close to a man and a woman doing it, just wish they would get a room, lol.
I can feel flattered in some vague way when some ugly woman hits on me, depending on if they are nice about it, women don't act like pigs generally, for every guy that acts like a pig, there is a hundred women that don't, so there is a difference. Since guys are pretty much 1000 times less attractive than the ugliest woman to me, having that happen a lot isn't appealing, lol. Still don't like having to turn them down, would rather avoid that too, but there is a system in place by convention for that, women generally don't approach guys, they don't have to, so it's a non issue, and if they do, they are nice about it. There is a bit of what makes her think she has a chance, unless you are some politically correct saint, so it makes you self conscious a bit, check what you look like in the mirror or something, lol. It's generally more annoyed and bothered than flattered, unwanted attention is like that.
I have no fear of gays, I'm not threatened in any way, I don't secretly fear that I am gay, but I don't have any desire to be a part of that culture, I don't want to join a high society club either, different groups got their own ways and they are to your taste or not. I find the automatic defensive replies to someone honestly expressing how they feel to be a waste of time, who gets in the last comeback foolishness, who cares?
I don't find the concept of gay sex between males disgusting, nothing to do with me, but don't like it taking up slots in my porn channels, lol. Looks rather boring and limited to me, but I don't have any reaction to it. Don't like looking at naked guys in general, they are either disgusting or they make me feel like maybe I should work out more, lol. To each their own, but they might as well be sheep for all they do for me, thank god for lesbian porn, lol. I have stood two feet away from guys going mad at each other and I feel the same way about being close to a man and a woman doing it, just wish they would get a room, lol.
I can feel flattered in some vague way when some ugly woman hits on me, depending on if they are nice about it, women don't act like pigs generally, for every guy that acts like a pig, there is a hundred women that don't, so there is a difference. Since guys are pretty much 1000 times less attractive than the ugliest woman to me, having that happen a lot isn't appealing, lol. Still don't like having to turn them down, would rather avoid that too, but there is a system in place by convention for that, women generally don't approach guys, they don't have to, so it's a non issue, and if they do, they are nice about it. There is a bit of what makes her think she has a chance, unless you are some politically correct saint, so it makes you self conscious a bit, check what you look like in the mirror or something, lol. It's generally more annoyed and bothered than flattered, unwanted attention is like that.
Reverend said:
No one will believe me but I'm not photogenic at all. My wife's co-workers never said anything to her, but from pics of me she had at work they all thought I was ugly and couldn't believe a woman as attractive as she is married someone like me. When they finally met me they later told her how cute she thought I was. And they weren't being just polite, because one of them in her mid 20s still teases my wife saying that if we ever split up she wants me.
Don't get me wrong, I don't turn heads when I walk into a room. The wife's co-workers were just surprised by the 'real' me compared to what they expected based on pictures. Everyone who knows me has commented on this. Besides, when I used to go to gay bars with friends the gay guys would go nuts over me, so nyah nyah I am a pretty boy. Or at least I was in my youth.
You, on the other hand, my dog wouldn't fuck, and it's been dead for some 22 years.
digitalwanderer
Legend
THANK THE GODS!!!!!Reverend said:
digitalwanderer
Legend
There are other perks too.MuFu said:
digitalwanderer
Legend
Mainly haircut savings
, but there is also the added bonus of totally giving up worrying about your appearence too.
A very liberating feeling. 8)
A very liberating feeling. 8)
Amazing the input on society Benny Hill had.MuFu said:
digitalwanderer
Legend
In my case it's not really "baldness" so much as "hair migration"...MuFu said:
...the hair is still there, it just stopped growing on my head and started growing in other places. :?
