Back after a long absence

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Mize, Oct 17, 2016.

  1. Mize

    Mize 3dfx Fan
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    Greetings to B3D old timers. It's been a long time since I've spent any time around here. Thought I'd drop in and say hello and tell a bit about my absence.

    Long story short, a year ago I was paralyzed by a reckless driver who, with the sun in her eyes, tried to beat the light on a left turn and wound up nearly cutting me in half with the roof of her car. I was cycling. My head went through her windshield and my legs over her roof. Combined speed on excess of 50 mph. Spent five weeks in the hospital where they fused my spine from T5 to T9. I'm paralyzed from the chest (T7) down.

    I had taken up racing (bicycles) two years earlier and was a competitive cat 3 at 48 years old. I was riding about 10,000 miles per year for training etc.

    The good news is I have an amazing wife and, between the two of us, we've successfully dodged the anger, depression and self-destructive tendencies that often plague spinal cord injury victims during their first year. In fact, most couples don't survive the first year as the injured partner often withdraws and takes out their anger on the able bodied partner who is struggling with difficult changes and a new role as a caregiver. Divorce is the norm.

    Work, conversely, was not so nice a story. After sixteen years with the same business (that I owned at one time) where I managed sites in Ohio, Wisconsin, Beijing and Shanghai, I was told that I couldn't lead from a wheelchair. They refused to let me come back to work.. At first they wanted a doctor's note, then another stating I could work full time in there office, then another stating I could travel extensively, each time raising the bar when I met the last. It was clear they wanted to keep me on disability until my contact lapsed. Nice bunch of folks.

    Anyway, I'm doing well. I drive, I'm mostly independent and I'm working on two new ventures that will, I hope, generate some income while making a positive difference in the world.

    I haven't been gaming much. My main rig was in my basement which isn't accessible for me and I just haven't had the urge. I did play some Fallout 4 remotely on my ps4 using a dual shock and an Android tablet after I first got home from the hospital but I got bored with it quickly.

    So that's my update. Hope the other old timers are all well.

    See you around... Probably in rpsc ;-)
     
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  2. London Geezer

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    Mate! I'm rather speechless - my dad died in a very similar accident a few years ago - so all I can do is wish you the best of the best. And welcome back!
     
  3. I.S.T.

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    Shit, man. Did you take those people to court to punish them for what they did?

    I hope those ventures work out for ya.
     
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  4. Davros

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    I'm so sorry


    Although it is terrible what happened to you....
    Not being able to play fallout 4 on p.c is shocking
     
    #4 Davros, Oct 17, 2016
    Last edited: Oct 17, 2016
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  5. Tahir2

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    Thoughts and prayers with you and your family Mize, glad everything is looking good for you now :)
     
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  6. digitalwanderer

    digitalwanderer Dangerously Mirthful
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    OMG Mize, I'm so sorry to hear! You're handling it insanely well, is there anything any of us can do to help? And all my best wishes buddy, you've been missed.
     
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  7. eloyc

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    I just want to say thank you for sharing your story.

    I wish you the best!
     
  8. TheAlSpark

    TheAlSpark Moderator
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  9. nutball

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    Shit. Bad karma fella.

    Best wishes to you and your good wife. Stay strong and stay together.
     
  10. Mize

    Mize 3dfx Fan
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    So the driver had state minimum insurance and zero assets. Her insurance coughed up $25k which was less than 10% of my first week in the hospital. My health insurance paid much of the rest but you'd be unpleasantly surprised to hear about all the things they won't cover.

    As to my employer that's in the courts now but there trial date isn't until late next year.

    We were insanely fortunate that we had substantial retirement savings. Had. Our out of pocket is six figures :-(
     
  11. Silent_Buddha

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    My condolences, and welcome back.

    A few decades ago my aunt went through something similar when a driver ran a red light. Luckily she just barely missed having her spinal cord severed but lived with chronic pain in her lower body until her death recently.

    I'm glad to see that your family is supportive, that you're dealing with it as well as you are, and that your marriage has survived. Good things all.

    Regards,
    SB
     
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  12. BRiT

    BRiT (>• •)>⌐■-■ (⌐■-■)
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    I'm so sorry to hear. I wish you and your family the best of luck and good fortune going forward.
     
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  13. Mize

    Mize 3dfx Fan
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    Unfortunately I too cope with chronic and pretty severe pain (both neuromuscular and nerve pain). Just one of many things I had no clue about when it comes to paralysis.
     
  14. zed

    zed
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    Wow, shit.
    On a positive note, strides! are being made in this field

    One has to do something with their lives instead of just taking the easy path, I may be going over to africa soon to start a business and also hopefully make a positive difference.
     
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  15. orangpelupa

    orangpelupa Elite Bug Hunter
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    omg mize. glad your life worked out good, you are awesome, your wife is awesome.

    my uncle got half of his body paralized, so i see it first-hand (first-eyes?) how that thing can change someone soooo much and put lots of stress to the immediate family.

    goodluck with your new vultres!
     
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  16. DuckThor Evil

    DuckThor Evil Anas platyrhynchos
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    I'm very sad to hear about your accident. I've checked your profile every once in a while and wondered what you are up to.

    I'm glad to hear that you and your wife is handling this so well. You've always left the impression of a man with strong/solid character and a good head on the shoulders, so it's not a surprise, but I still can't imagine everything you must have gone through...

    All the best in your future endeavors and I hope we see you more here as well.
     
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  17. tangey

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    I know your name from here, but I don't think we've ever been in discussion on a thread.

    Sorry to hear about your life-changing event. I understand others reflecting on people from their walk of life that have had something similar, all I can say in that regard is that for each person, a major trauma like this is a total personal and individual event. Not only medically, but emotionally, and in terms of strength of will and family back-up. How someone copes / deals / gets on with it can't be reflected on others.

    It's great that you found out you made a wonderful choice of partner, what can be worse after going thru what you have, and then finding that the one thing you were hoping might stay constant also evaporates.

    Thanks for sharing.
     
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  18. pascal

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    OMG Mize!
    I know you are smart and emotionally intelligent, so there is not much I can advise.
    Just wish the best for you.
     
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  19. Entropy

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    Really sorry to hear about your accident Mize.
    Sounds quite similar to what happened to my brother.
    Make sure you talk to your partner about everything, even the hardest parts. Cherish her and give her breathing room. Be aware that your pain will affect your personality, either directly or through the effect of your painkillers.
    And when you can't keep a positive spirit, fake it, and it will return. After all, you escaped death and gained some time before your next encounter with the reaper. It's too valuable to loose.
    Best wishes
     
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  20. Sxotty

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    HOLY SH*T I did not see this earlier Mize as I just go to RPSC sometimes. I usually ride 10miles to and from work including along quite a nasty merge onto bridge that is 45mph speed limit. An avid and well known cyclist here just passed out and crashed and paralyzed himself as well. I am getting a little worried now by all these events, but I will try to tell myself that statistically it is still ok. I am quite honestly upset to hear this happened to you. I am happy to hear you are doing ok, but it shakes me a bit and not just because I can see it happening to me. Anyway hang in there and it is great to hear you are trying something new. It is better to try and fail then do nothing. Ignore the platitudes if you want, but I truly mean them and don't really know what to say any better.
     
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