Advice needed, serious issue
- Thread starter _xxx_
- Start date
_xxx_ said:
Yea and? My point was that a bit of prison will force this kid to pick how the rest of his life will be. A few months in jail could be the best thing for him, or the worst. It is a quick way for the familly to discover this. Many kids in this country need to see how bad things can really be before they have gone to far to the "bad" side.
BTW, I have done 3 weeks in (county) jail. Changed my perspective a bit when I was 18.
Cartoon Corpse
Veteran
_xxx_ said:
then i'd explain to him about how some folks should not do substances (due to these things) some people should strictly control their 'partying' (ie home), some people you don't want around when they party (like his group)...victimizers. and explain to him there are risks and consequences. that's reality.
does he have a job? sorry his dad died, but that stuff happens to some folks, it's not a license for mayhem (though it can affect you adversely involuntarily, you need to adjust your habits till you get aclimated (that's what i did)). can you put him under written (enforcable) financial arrangement to pay you back? how much are the damages?
does he deserve a 2nd chance? or is this like his 10th chance?
CC, as I said, it's not about money. He's been studying, but I think that's about to end from what I've heard, he didn't even try to learn anything in the last few months.
It's not that bad, he's not a real criminal or such. That was the only really bad thing he did, but his lifestyle doesn't seem to change since then. He hasn't done anything else that bad ever, but he just doesn't seem to care about anything anymore and I'm afraid it might get worse. No, I'm sure it's bound to get worse at some point. There's noone there whom he sees as any kind of authority, I'm 2000 km away (otherwise I'd kick his arse thoroughly twice a day if needed).
It's not that bad, he's not a real criminal or such. That was the only really bad thing he did, but his lifestyle doesn't seem to change since then. He hasn't done anything else that bad ever, but he just doesn't seem to care about anything anymore and I'm afraid it might get worse. No, I'm sure it's bound to get worse at some point. There's noone there whom he sees as any kind of authority, I'm 2000 km away (otherwise I'd kick his arse thoroughly twice a day if needed).
Jew said:
my friend did 6 months in bosnian serb concentration camp.... that changed him alot.
you cant even compere western prisons to Balkans..... croatian ones are nasty, but the most famous in all former Yugoslavia was bosnian one....
"U Zenicu kada pođem ja...."....
Jew, getting 18 year old kid inside with people of which are some worse then those kept in US maximum security prisons isnt good idea....
there is almost no separation between types of prisoners.... and kid might get out impressed by those people inside... not to mention he could "prove" himself as you say and grew balls ... and take wrong road....
3 weeks in some cousy jail in US is very diffferent then being thrown with bunch of PTSS crazed maniacs that were chopping heads and torturing people during the war....
_xxx_ (upozno sam raznu ekipu preko tog fredna, od vukovaraca, merčepovaca, čak smo i sa Å telom (od Tute) bili jednom u druÅ¡tvu.... njemu su ti ljudi ono WooooW, on je pao zbog droge prije 10 godina (znači imo je 21) i starija ekipa ga je gotivila jer nije druko i sad je sav u tom điru... to je najgore od svega.... najgore je kaj mu se može svidit ekpia jer klinca je tamo jako lako impresionirat i zadivit... joÅ¡ ako je povodljiv....
pravi materijal za stare okorjele smradove)
daj mu šanse, pa ako zajebe... bar znaš da ste probali i da je to njegov izbor i to mu mora biti jasno....
once again, sorry for croatian guys..... you wouldnt understand some references even if it was in english....
but basically what i am saying to _xxx_ is that kid might go there and be impressed by "real men", specially if he is not kind of leader material, old inmates will use him and give him feeling like he is "one of the guys"...he'll end up with phone numbers and next time he'll do 5 or 10 years for something much worse...
JEW..... military != prison.....
military (as you did) is pure choice.... prison isnt.... no matter what you think
silence said:my friend did 6 months in bosnian serb concentration camp.... that changed him alot.
you cant even compere western prisons to Balkans..... croatian ones are nasty, but the most famous in all former Yugoslavia was bosnian one....
"U Zenicu kada pođem ja...."....
Jew, getting 18 year old kid inside with people of which are some worse then those kept in US maximum security prisons isnt good idea....
there is almost no separation between types of prisoners.... and kid might get out impressed by those people inside... not to mention he could "prove" himself as you say and grew balls ... and take wrong road....
3 weeks in some cousy jail in US is very diffferent then being thrown with bunch of PTSS crazed maniacs that were chopping heads and torturing people during the war....
_xxx_ (upozno sam raznu ekipu preko tog fredna, od vukovaraca, merčepovaca, čak smo i sa Štelom (od Tute) bili jednom u društvu.... njemu su ti ljudi ono WooooW, on je pao zbog droge prije 10 godina (znači imo je 21) i starija ekipa ga je gotivila jer nije druko i sad je sav u tom điru... to je najgore od svega.... najgore je kaj mu se može svidit ekpia jer klinca je tamo jako lako impresionirat i zadivit... još ako je povodljiv....
pravi materijal za stare okorjele smradove)
daj mu šanse, pa ako zajebe... bar znaš da ste probali i da je to njegov izbor i to mu mora biti jasno....
once again, sorry for croatian guys..... you wouldnt understand some references even if it was in english....
but basically what i am saying to _xxx_ is that kid might go there and be impressed by "real men", specially if he is not kind of leader material, old inmates will use him and give him feeling like he is "one of the guys"...he'll end up with phone numbers and next time he'll do 5 or 10 years for something much worse...
JEW..... military != prison.....
military (as you did) is pure choice.... prison isnt.... no matter what you think
What the heck? Is this kid gona be put in maximum security? Or in prison overseas? You have successfully completely confused me.
How this kid changes to a bit of prison time will tell you everything about his core character. That part is too late to change. Instead of wasting money... find out what his character is. It will make or break him.
If you tell him this is exactly what you expect it will do.... it might help him (is he stubborn?) put together the courage to make the best out of it. I dunno.
Military is not an option. His father was shot during the war (was a civilian, though) and he also was there all that time and also got to feel some of it (they had to leave their house and lived a few years wherever they could as refugees, essentially).
We decided to give him the money but punish him otherwise in a less extreme manner. He will get a chance, and I'll certainly make it VERY clear it's the last one.
We decided to give him the money but punish him otherwise in a less extreme manner. He will get a chance, and I'll certainly make it VERY clear it's the last one.
_xxx_ said:
while there is more then good chance that many of inmates were involved in warcrimes...
of worst kind.....
you really dont want to put 18-year old kid with guy that executed dozens of people or burnt them to death or any other attrocity you can imagine....
prijatelju, ne shvaća on i nikad neće....
if it's in Bosnia I'd bail him out, that is for sure, but dunno how to make sure he doesn't do it again? I guess that is the tough one, but jail will surely do him no good over there. 
Cartoon Corpse
Veteran
_xxx_ said:
i only recommend prison for victimizers. and depending on the victimization (property damage level, or personal physical loses), given the state of prisons...the US is no 'cozy' prison system, the public perception of prison life and the reality are FAR apart...i had a biker friend (now dead) who spent 3 years in prison. it changes you. especially if your not the alpha male. in the US the african american population in prison typical vent their frustration with US racism on any whites with impunity. there are psychos everywhere. and most prison guards aren't einsteins either (end of the line sort of legit job here), and some are no better than criminals (sadistic even) themselves. read some internet testimonials.
sounds like he just messed up. if you haven't been bailing him out like this before. and you have the resources. perhaps you should spare him a much more harsh punishment than his crime deserves. but perhaps he should be made aware of what prison life is really like in your country in hopes it will act as a deterent, if he can't find it in himself to not victimize others at this point in his life.
course it's theorized that most top executives are merely sociopaths. hmm.
But the victims are his mother, sister and our grandma which he lives with. They're rather on the poor side (well, poor as in the US, see RPSC poverty thread ) and really have to fight, he contributes _nothing_ and doesn't really seem to care much. I don't want him to ruin _their_ lives, it was more than enough for my grandma having the police search the house for drugs with the whole neighbourhood watching. Hell, it was even on the local TV (without names, though).
I _will_ bail him out and make it clear it's the last chance. We'll try some less severe measures first.
) and really have to fight, he contributes _nothing_ and doesn't really seem to care much. I don't want him to ruin _their_ lives, it was more than enough for my grandma having the police search the house for drugs with the whole neighbourhood watching. Hell, it was even on the local TV (without names, though).I _will_ bail him out and make it clear it's the last chance. We'll try some less severe measures first.
_xxx_ said:But the victims are his mother, sister and our grandma which he lives with. They're rather on the poor side (well, poor as in the US, see RPSC poverty thread
I _will_ bail him out and make it clear it's the last chance. We'll try some less severe measures first.
I'd give him a worse treatment he'd get in prisons - meaning i'd chain him at home, in a room with no phone and TV. or make the chain long enough for him to be able to do house works. Cleaning and stuff. But no contact with the outside world. At least he won't spend time with god knows who.
I'd also whip him but that's just me.
_xxx_ said:
You'll find a way. You have to or you'll lose him. He will either run away or end up in prison. Either way u lose him.
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