Movie Reviews 2.0

Yeah no way in hell Slumdog deserved 8 oscars. Silly really. Who cares about the Oscars anyways?

 

I think it was a rare instance where they could assign Oscars and profit some really poor kids. It's very similar to awarding the kind of sentiment that you find in Titanic or The English Patient, except this time it's like the winning of the Oscars by the actual kids from the slum is as much of a sappy story as the movie would otherwise have been.

So even if the movie is actually quite good too, it's hard to argue that these ties with reality did not matter.

Seriously though, I find it hard to find fault with that.

 

I do want to see Milk. I remember Harvey (and that bastard White and his Twinkies) as I lived part of the year in San Jose throughout the 70's.

 

I'd like to see Milk, Slumdog, and the Wrestler at some point. Probably when they're available on movies on demand.

Pineapple Express - 7/10 Not as funny as I expected it to be, but enjoyed Franco's take on the neo-stoner.

 

Milk 8/10 ... I'm not a huge Penn fan but, from some clips I've watched of Harvey Milk, he really nailed it.

Rachel Getting Married 5/10 ... I appreciate the craftsmanship that went into the meticulous recreation of wedding atmosphere, but I thought there was too much cliche, too much hipster-ism and way too little substance.

 

Zach and Miri make a Porno: 5/10 Just not that funny. Turns into a sappy movie and and gets boring quickly. No real end with the Porno part.

Pineapple Express: 5/10 Half Baked, Harold and Kuman 1 & 2 are much more funny for getting high movies. This is average. The only funny character is the guy with the mullet.

 

I was bored to tears with Pineapple Express. Turned it off after thirty minutes. Maybe it gets better later?

 

They introduced a new character that amused me throughout but the rest of the movie was quite average thus my average score. Revised to 5/10 to prove it's averageness.

 

Watchmen - 7/10

This was one of the more graphically violent movies Ive seen in awhile (especially when compared to other comic book based movies). I mean.. holy cow! I haven't read the comic myself so the movie was abit confusing at the start. Out of all the characters, Roschak was the most memorable. Hes character was quite intriguing, not to mention his sense of humor

 

Rorschach.

He was my favourite character when I read through the comics - you just can't beat a do-gooding psycho.

 

Sex drive - 7.5/10 Reminded me quite a bit of Road/Euro Trip. Seth Green as the wise-cracking Amish smart-ass was worth the rental alone.

 

The Watchmen - 8.5/10 Some bad pacing throughout, but overall a good movie for fans or the unwashed. Very brutal fight sequences, some almost painful to watch. The acting was tolerable, nothing as near as annoying as the Batman growl from Bail, though the girl playing Silk Spectre was probably the worst. Great seeing Jackie Earle Haley again after 30 years (Breaking Away is one of my all-time favs), and he did a good job as Rorschach.

 

I'm giving Watchmen 4/6. It was too long, some unnecessary scenes, some bad acting, but also some funny moments, some awesome moments, really good effects. It's a pretty good film.

 

Watchmen 5/10, it's way too long, it's slOoWw, aww, some good moments yes, but the hype that was around it made me give it 5 instead of 6.

 

Finally saw Slumdog Millionaire and it's a 9/10 for me. A bit sappy at times but great cinema.

 

Noise (Tim Robbins). Liked it, nothing too fancy, but amusing ... 7.5/10.

 

The Watchmen 7.5/10

I liked it, but the pacing was bit off and in a film format showing so much flashbacks and so little forward going story was kind of out of place in my opinion. Also in the comic book Dr Manhattan's existence in time was portrayed better and more throural. It was long, but it didn't bore me.

The Wrestler 8.5/10
A very simple but touching story of a man, who's struggling in life and struggling to let go of the only things he know. I think it was very well made, and Mickey Rourke was an ideal actor for the movie.

 

I *hate* comments like this. How should anything affect the movie other than the movie itself. Manage your own expectations please.

Back on topic: Watchmen - */10. That's right: "*". I like a lot of films, I love a large number, I dislike and I despise even more. Not in my recent (10-15 years) recollections, can I say that a film had less of an impact on me.

I only hated one scene in the film - which is a shock for me, I hate 3-4 scenes in Transformers, which is one of my all time favourite films. There are some AMAZINGLY good bits in it, the first 20 mins (the credits are awesome), the prison section (both in the cell and the breakout), the way the "alternate ending" was handled, the clock palace, the fights in general and Rorschach in general. I for one also didn't mind (until the last moment) Akerman's acting, and man, is she pretty. Shes a blond in real life, and no where near as hot as she is as a brunette in the film. I'm also a huge fan of boobies, and I liked the latex leggings in the sex scene. Colour me impressed with nudity in films. As a general rule, society is way to fussy about nekid peoples in films these days, and I feel its a shame, bring back the early 90's!

The bad bits weren't awful, they were just "WTF were they thinking" moments. Nixon's nose as a classic moment.

BUT... the story hasn't translated well over the last 20 years. The Cold War went cold, and we are all too aware of that. So, to me and mine that have spoken about why it made no impact, the best we can figure is that there is no... "threat". We just weren't able to connect anymore with the "ZOMG we all gonna go BOOM", because thats not how we see "threats" anymore. Threats are now small (relative to nukes) bombs in shops (Children of Men), bombs on buses (Negotiator etc) or you know, real world stuff... 9/11. Nowadays (me and mine at least) feel that large scale destruction is "out of our hands" whereas these smaller scale threats are more about "fate targeting you". What if you had gotten on the next bus, or walked down that other street. Also with the smaller scale stuff, you're always aware that most likely you are gonna be leaving behind loved ones, parents, spouses, children, who are gonna grieve and feel the pain for much longer after you're gone. If you love and have loved ones, their pain is usually more important than your own. If everyone dies, no one feels pain, C'est la vie.

What this film needed was more of the connection to the audience that let us feel/imagine the threat of the story, because just saying "there are nukes out there" just doesn't cut it anymore. The Cold War ended without the OTT actions in the film, so we've lost perspective about why it was good or bad. Again, rather than being horrified, or happy that the crisis was averted, I just felt... "WTF dude", nothing more.

And then... after Ive watch 2 hours and 30 mins of "cool, meh, cool, meh, meh, cool..." comes the closing 5-10 mins. And it kills it. The final scene twixt Spectre 1 & 2 is so badly scripted and acted that it actually shocked me. And the very final scene, which in the novel is an "aaaah!" moment is reduced to next to no speech and a nothing moment. Then My Chemical Romance screech over the closing credits with one of the worst covers ever. No impact, no conclusion, and crap song. If I had walked out 10 mins before the end, I might have actually have had a real feeling about the film. But as it stands... I'm left with a hole.

Not "it could have been so much better" because parts of it are utterly awesome. Not "that was shit" because its not; like any film its let down by some parts but not critically. I just have no feelings about it one way or the other. I didn't connect with it on any level; the acting wasn't bad; the SFX are very good; stylistically its great; but then... there is no heart.

This isn't me agreeing with Alan Moore's assumption that it's "un-film-able", because his reasoning is purely egotistical and reads like he's never watch a film in his life; I find myself offended by his reasoning infact.

Not enough was done to connect the audience to the subject matter, so no matter how good the parts were, the sums just don't add up. I have no feelings one way or another so my rating (for now) stays as */10.

 

Exactly how I would rate and summarize the film (and IIRC did in the old thread just before it was annihilated).

I've thought of myself as a rather cynical movie watcher, but for some reason, it took me over a day to recover enough that I can bring back in my mind scenes of this film without getting a lump in my throat.