What age is it best to get married?

[Dr. Ffreeze]

K.I.L.E.R,

I know most of you guys are happily married.

Aye, she is the love of my life.

When is the appropriate age to do so?

Hmm, I don't know. I got married at 29 and she was 22. We knew each other for 3 years before we got married. I moved 1,800 miles away while we were dating. It was great for our relationship. Before I moved away, I was afraid that she was just a good friend as we had so much fun together. Well, once I was away I was sure that not only did we have loads of fun together, but I was in love with her. RaR! =)

How are you happy?

Only way I can imagine us happier is to have children. I need no more money, no other career, nothing else in my life but what I have now, and kids if we are so blessed. =)

Is communication the trick to it all?

If I had to pick one thing, it would have to be communication. Of coarse you have love, else you should not get married. You also need 100% trust, openness, and share many of the same interests.

Many people have told me that they don't tell their spouse 100% of everything. How sad. My wife know all about me. She knows not only all of my good traits but also all of my bad ones. I don't try to hide my bad traits from her. When she says she loves me, all of me, I know she knows the real me, not just some facade.

100% trust. I never fear that she will leave me for another man. She never fears that I will leave her for another woman. Having no jealously in our relationship or fear is a very nice thing to have. She can tell me she things a guy is cute, and I can tell her I think this gal is cute. With 100% trust, we don't have to pretend that once we got married we thought everyone of the opposite sex suddenly became ugly. =)

Love (duh). I am not talking selfish love, the love that is based on what you get out of the relationship, but selfless love. When a fight happens, look at it from the other persons side. When a fight happens, stay focused on trying to resolve the fight, not convince them that you are right. Server your spouse. Sacrifice for your spouse. With 100% trust you don't have to fear that you will taken advantage of. =)

Dr. Ffreeze

 

[Sticky]

Here is a story for you from a happily married man.

Been together 3 years anda couple of months.

Met my wife in march of 1999, she lived in cali and was up visiting a college friend of mine. I talked to her all of three minutes. A few months later she instant messaged me. Then we starting iming every day type thing, evolved into phone calls. THen she eventually came and visited me for a week in November of 99. A month later I went and visited her, then she came and saw me a couple of times between january of 00 and march, we announced our engagement then and were married in march.

We both said several times throughout the beginning that this wouldnt work, but there was a connection that jsut wouldnt die.

After we were marreid she came up to live with me in Calgary, then I found a higher paying better job in cali and we moved down there.

The first few months were great, the next year and a half sucked.. I had considered divorce but we both kept at it.. and things are damn good... Kids are up next.

I was 22 in september of 99. 23 when I was married, 23 when I moved to cali and bought a house


I will agree with the money bit. My wife and I keep seperate bank accounts, she doesnt work (damn good housewife tho lol). We pay the bills and put some aside each month for both of us to spend, and come tax return and bonus time we each take a portion and spend and put the rest in savings. So money is never an issue.

I think comprimise is essential in an relationship. boy I am getting long winded....For any newbie to marriage... attention to the wife is neccesary.... Clean up afteryoursel saves lots of arguements, dont get caught smoking (lol my wife hates that)

Some cases there just maybe personality differences that cant be worked out...

Thats all for now

regards,

Sticky