Excuses for being caught napping @ Work

D

Deepak

B3D Yoddha
Veteran
10. "They told me at the blood bank this might happen."

9. "This is just a 15 minute power-nap like they raved about in that time management course you sent me to."

8. "Whew! Guess I left the top off the white-out. You probably got here just in time!"

7. "I wasn't sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm."

6. "I was testing my keyboard for drool resistance."

5. "I was doing a highly specific Yoga exercise to relieve work-related stress. Are you discriminatory toward people who practice Yoga?"

4. "Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem."

3. "The coffee machine is broken..."

2. "Someone must've put decaf in the wrong pot..."

1. " ...... AMEN!"
 
I know one:

I'm sleeping because I've turned straight.

It's funny because I meant it sexually but it sounds druggish. :LOL:
 
K.I.L.E.R said:
I'm sleeping because I've turned straight.

It's funny because I meant it sexually but it sounds druggish. :LOL:
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Over in the states here we'd say it as "I've went clean" more in relation to drug useage, "I've turned straight" would pretty much be used only for the sexual reference.

Just wanted to let you know the joke worked from a US perspective. ;)
 
I fell asleep at work yesterday. When tapped on the shoulder by a coworker, I promptly replied with "Fuck off." I think I was still asleep.

Luckily, she thought it was funny. :D
 
I actually let a guy go for persistent sleeping on the job. Reasonably good job too; $60k/yr kind of position. And not after the first, second, or third time either --we're talking months of counseling and increasing warnings where it was going to end up. Not a medical problem either, just too much in his life he was doing to all hours at night and couldn't stay awake the next day.
 
geo said:
I actually let a guy go for persistent sleeping on the job. Reasonably good job too; $60k/yr kind of position. And not after the first, second, or third time either --we're talking months of counseling and increasing warnings where it was going to end up. Not a medical problem either, just too much in his life he was doing to all hours at night and couldn't stay awake the next day.
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Out of curiosity, was the work assigned to him getting done on time and properly?

epic
 
You work?
How old are you?

The Baron said:
I fell asleep at work yesterday. When tapped on the shoulder by a coworker, I promptly replied with "Fuck off." I think I was still asleep.

Luckily, she thought it was funny. :D
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K.I.L.E.R said:
You work?
How old are you?
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Summer job. Contract, don't have regular work but have to be around. E.g., I've worked ~9-10 hours since Monday, and I'm working about 8 today.
 
epicstruggle said:
Out of curiosity, was the work assigned to him getting done on time and properly?
Click to expand...

Properly, yeah. Not on time in my opinion, but that's a harder one to prove for the kind of job he had. It wasn't a building widgets, cleaning rooms, or filing forms kind of job. But his performance over time, as measured by output, was less than his peers, so you have that standard to work with. And it's a major morale problem. It creates resentment in the rest of the team, and in other departments. This in turn gets higher levels of managment, and company HR involved. The genius who can outwork everyone else in one hour per day and sleep the other seven at his desk better not work for a large organization.
 
geo said:
Properly, yeah. Not on time in my opinion, but that's a harder one to prove for the kind of job he had. It wasn't a building widgets, cleaning rooms, or filing forms kind of job. But his performance over time, as measured by output, was less than his peers, so you have that standard to work with. And it's a major morale problem. It creates resentment in the rest of the team, and in other departments. This in turn gets higher levels of managment, and company HR involved. The genius who can outwork everyone else in one hour per day and sleep the other seven at his desk better not work for a large organization.
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Yeah, if he wasnt producing as much as his peers, than that is a good measurement of how his sleeping on the job effect the job.

epic
 
digitalwanderer said:
Over in the states here we'd say it as "I've went clean" more in relation to drug useage, "I've turned straight" would pretty much be used only for the sexual reference.

Just wanted to let you know the joke worked from a US perspective. ;)
Click to expand...

Do you really say:"I've went clean?". That doesn't sound so "clean" at all :D
 
Nice. I honestly didn't think you were older than I was.
I thought you were older than me because you have a job and I don't. :LOL:
Please tell me you are less than 21 years old. :p

Not sure how difficult finding contract work is in the USA but down here if you're my age you need to have extensive experience. It's really difficult.
If you are my age or younger then a real big congrats to you for finding contract work.
Your work involve programming?

The Baron said:
Summer job. Contract, don't have regular work but have to be around. E.g., I've worked ~9-10 hours since Monday, and I'm working about 8 today.
Click to expand...
 
K.I.L.E.R said:
I thought you were older than me because you have a job and I don't. :LOL:
Please tell me you are less than 21 years old. :p
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I think you'll find many of your fellow Australians have been working since their early-to-mid-teens. I'm 21 and have been squeezing in a 'real' (ie. non-grunt-work) job alongside study for a few years now.
 
Oh okay then, I guess I'm lazy. :p

Fodder said:
I think you'll find many of your fellow Australians have been working since their early-to-mid-teens. I'm 21 and have been squeezing in a 'real' (ie. non-grunt-work) job alongside study for a few years now.
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