Jobs, Careers, and Life

[Nite_Hawk]

Hi Guys,

I'm having a bit of a quarter-life crisis, so let me vent a bit. My wife and I live in Minneapolis, Minnesota. We both like it here; we have a nice house, people are mostly friendly,our family is here, my wife has a great job teaching in an elementary spanish immersion school.

The problem is my job. I'm a software engineer for a defense contractor here. I was hired about a year ago, straight out of college. The job seemed like a great opportunity. Good pay, good benefits, working in a research division... The problem is that it's not really like what I expected. We don't do nearly as much research as I thought we would. Projects are won not based on their quality but by politics. People are jaded and unhappy, and my wife said I never seem happy anymore. I really don't have any friends at work.

I've been thinking a lot about it recently, and there are a couple of things I really want. I want to create something that people use, something that impresses people as much as when they watch the MGS4 trailer, or use Google Earth for the first time. I'd like to work on 3D graphics, be it driver development, writing GIS applications, working on 3D clustering/rendering systems, or videogame design. I'd like to work for a moral company, one that is honest and treats both its employees and its customers with respect. The problem is that even finding one of these criteria is pretty tough around here.

So I've started working on writing a raytracer, and I'm going to try to implement photon mapping, and hopefully at some point work start developing using gpgpu. I'm hoping to get my skill set in better shape so that if an opportunity presents itself I can at least say I gave it a shot. I'm trying to decide if I should try to get a civil service position at the University here and start going to graduate school for a 3D programming emphasis. My wife is also trying to convince me to go back to school for a teaching degree and teach highschool math or physics (it does have some appeal).


Have any of you guys felt this way? What did you do about it?

Nite_Hawk

 

[StefanS]

First of all, Nite_Hawk, do you feel almost permanently unhappy about your job? If no, those feelings will eventually vanish. Now and then I feel distraught about my job as well, usually when nothing works out as planned.
But if you're really fed up with your job, a little career change will work wonder. I used to do a lot of work in the surface physics area until I realized that I didn't want to spend the rest of my life in front of a STM. Basically, I just felt bored and unchallenged. Now that I am working on sg else in the theoretical field, I am feeling a lot more satisfied. So, from my personal perspective, I can recommend doing it.
Since you're already married, switching careers can complicate things quite a bit. You'll probably have to move, etc. So sort things out in advance. As for picking the profession as teacher, I don't think that this is the right job for you: You seem to be giving a lot more thought to creating the right software than to teaching. Additionally, you should be a awre of the fact that once you'll go teaching, getting back into your line of work will a lot harder. So if you change your mind yet again (this time to pursuing software development), you might run into a lot of problems.
Going to a graduate school might be a good idea. But keep in mind that autodidactic training might do the job as well, given that you seem pretty experienced. But I don't really know what is important for a 3d programmer.
Anyway, just take enough time to make your mind up und then make your decision.

 

[_xxx_]

The problem is that it's not really like what I expected. We don't do nearly as much research as I thought we would. Projects are won not based on their quality but by politics.

That's how it is in reality. Politics is ALWAYS king, in every company. If you're unhappy, leave. But don't expect it to get better elsewhere.

 

[krychek]

Wow I am in a pretty similar situation. I've been working for a year right after my college and there is not enough good graphics stuff to do at my job. There have been a few good challenges but that's it. The company I am working for has a research division but I haven't seen anything great come out of that even though what they are doing is just simple graphics applications research! I thought I would be meeting other people interested in graphics, but nopes, they call me an expert! There is just one other person here who knows a good deal of graphics.

But actually the people who I work with are very nice and some of us have become real good friends. I am happy about this aspect considering that I am from India, and I have been working in Germany (but I will be going back to India real soon).

I think its important to choose a company that is passionate about graphics, or atleast has a significant portion of its people working on graphics. Its scary to learn that its hard to find a good graphics job in US!

Anyway, I am interested in working in the same things as you mentioned. So what I am doing to overcome the lack of graphics at work is, learning and coding graphics at home, this reduces my unhappiness over not working with some really good graphics and might also help me get a better job, or so I hope! I am single so its easier for me to spend my free time on this, but there is never enough time to try all the different ideas! Another problem for me is that there are not many good graphics jobs in India so I am also considering going for Phd as I am pretty interested in graphics research.

 

[Lux_]

We both like it here; we have a nice house, people are mostly friendly,our family is here, my wife has a great job teaching in an elementary spanish immersion school.

Having your family near can be quite helpful when you have children. They say finding babysitters is not so easy in US, but you know better first hand.

Good pay, good benefits

Are these still OK?

Projects are won not based on their quality but by politics.

Unfortunately it seems it's quite common everywhere.

my wife said I never seem happy anymore.

Do everything you can to change that !!! A hobby, a sidebusiness, a child, travelling, whatever. I think it is far easier to find a new job than to find a new wife.

People are jaded and unhappy
I really don't have any friends at work.

Are you a lonely wolf, i.e. everybody else are buddies?

Anyway, talk to your colleagues and talk to your bosses. When everybody is unhappy, maybe they just need somebody to raise the issue. I've seen it couple of times.

I'd like to work for a moral company, one that is honest and treats both its employees and its customers with respect. The problem is that even finding one of these criteria is pretty tough around here.

I'm willing to bet it's like that everywhere.

WRT teaching: programming is working with ideas and machines. Teaching is working with people. Maybe you need mix of both. But it seems to *me* that being a teacher is more about how you treat pupils, how you talk to them etc. and less about the actual subject you teach. But I've never been a teacher and never been married to one, so what do I know.

I suggest you talk to your family (older people can be very smart ) and talk to your colleagues and bosses. Maybe something less drastic than a career change can be done.

When I was in similar situation I got married, got a child, bougt an apartment, changed a job and moved to another city (closer to parents), all within 6 months (OK, the child-part started a little earlier ). I'm happy with the outcome, but if you care about your nerves, I wouldn't suggest it all at once, if there are alternatives.

 

[Nite_Hawk]

Hi guys,

Thanks for all the great input! I've been trying to do a lot of 3D graphics work on the side, so that is helping. I'm hoping that as I become more experienced perhaps I'll actually know enough to be hired somewhere. I just got my raytracer to do rotated gride antialiasing for shadow/primitive boundaries and on reflections. It's quite exciting.

Someone here mentioned the advice of older people... I've done that somewhat, and I keep getting different answers. Some tell me it's not worth staying somewhere you dislike, others say "it's like that everywhere", and others say that I should get a MBA (business degree), so that I can become one of the managers on top and spend my time bullshiting with the rest of them.

I've thought a bit about maybe working for a non-profit organization. There is a United Way software engineering position near here that I might apply for. It doesn't sound like it's a terribly exciting job. Maybe I could convince them to help pay if I go back to school...

Nite_Hawk

 

[Geo]

Life is too short to be unhappy. Maybe you won't be able to find somewhere better, but I can't imagine why you wouldn't want to try. You'll have a better idea of what to look for next time, what questions to ask, and who to ask to talk to.

 

[Saem]

I'd suggest sticking with the current job for as long as possible. A few years of that and you'll have a lot of financial freedom. At that point, you could basically take any job, even if it was an enormous pay cut, because all you'd have to do is maintain what you have and save at a moderate rate for retirement.

In the meantime, try and make some friends at work. Seems like you're doing some fun stuff on your off time. If there are any opensource projects in the same vein you might want to give that a shot, it's usually chat rooms and e-mail but it's still contact with passionate people. I strongly recommend against and MBA, honestly, I don't know why they're even called Masters, you're handed some information and that's about it. In anycase, the market is a bit oversaturated by them. You'd be better served with a masters in Science, at the very least you could become a junior lecturer, the pay is good and so are the benefits, and it could lead to a part time Phd, or at the very least be an in on some research work.

 

[pascal]

Nite_Hawk

There is not much I can say. I have worked for many different companies (Large multinationals and small locals). All have politics, including the ones with the most challenging projects.

My advice: keep the feet on the ground and the head on the sky. I mean keep your job and work hard in your own projects/study. Enjoy life and your family. Revaluate the situation after two years.